


Explosive, Corrosive (Self-Preservation)

by GideonGraystairs



Series: Tumblr Fics [21]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Established Relationship, Fights, M/M, Making Up, Relationship Discussions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-22
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-11-03 20:49:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10975065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GideonGraystairs/pseuds/GideonGraystairs
Summary: This was how they worked; angry in different ways, but always at the same time.





	Explosive, Corrosive (Self-Preservation)

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on [Tumblr](http://raphaelsantiago.co.vu) 10/18/2016.
> 
> Requested by Anonymous as a line of dialogue prompt: "You know, I have my own, little, everyday routines. And changing all of them because you want to be a part of my life seems just too hard" Malec please C:
> 
> The last prompt fill I had to transfer over! That just leaves the two billion other fics. Ugh. I vaguely remember liking this when I wrote it.

They were fighting - an increasingly common occurrence as of late. Alec’s gestures were clipped where Magnus’ had became broad and angry, one voice carefully contained and the other a rising tide crashing harder and harder against the shore.

It was how they worked, angry in different ways but always at the same time.

“I’m not asking you to give up your life for me,” Magnus growled, slamming the dresser drawer shut with more than enough force. It was immensely satisfying to feel the reverberation of the wood against the metal handle, and he repeated the action just to feel it again.

Alec, for his part, was unnaturally still, every muscle tensed and forced into immobility. When he was angry, it raged in the eerie calmness of his being, in the silent force behind his eyes, in white knuckles and planted feet. He was not an expressive person the way Magnus was, and somehow the absence of angry motions from him only coaxed them more from Magnus.

“I didn’t say you were,” Alec replied, calm and full of intention.

Magnus didn’t look at him. He focused on the mirror hanging beside them, where he could see how the indignation infested his features and how the fury did not touch Alec’s. He resisted the urge to smash it.

“You heavily implied it,” he snapped. “Which is as good as saying it.”

Alec’s mouth twisted and then smoothed back into impassiveness. “There are things I’m not going to give up for you, Magnus,” he said, moving back to the real subject of their argument. “That doesn’t mean I don’t care about you or that I don’t want to be with you. It just means that I’m still my own person apart from you and that I have my own life apart from yours.”

“That does mean you don’t want to be with me.” Magnus shook his head, disbelieving. He turned away from the mirror to pin Alec with an expression that couldn’t decide whether it wanted to be more hurt or angry. “You’re supposed to want to share your whole life with me. For us to build one together. How is this ever supposed to go anywhere if we’re over here and the rest of your life is over there?”

Alec’s expression decided on frustration. “Building a life together doesn’t mean we stop having our own. It doesn’t mean you’re suddenly involved in absolutely everything I do. You know, I have my own way of doing things, my own routine, my own responsibilities. Changing all of them to include you isn’t just impossible, it’s also not a fair expectation for you to have of me.”

“It’s not supposed to be hard, Alec! You’re supposed to _want_ to do it, to _want_ to include me.”

“And I do in a lot of things,” Alec countered. For the first time since the argument had started, his hand unclenched and moved to sweep brusquely through his messy hair. “Just not absolutely _everything_. You can’t tell me that’s unreasonable.”

Magnus shook his head again, a jerky motion. The usual fluidity to his actions had vanished the moment their disagreement had sparked into a fight. “Fine, you’re right. It’s not. But the way you say it makes it sound like I’m a burden. Like our relationship is a chore or just part of the daily routine. Like it’s a pain to include me in anything at all.”

“That’s not…” Alec trailed off, frowning. He glanced at the mirror across the room from him with a sigh. Magnus didn’t have to look to know their reflections were still distorted in the glass, still unrecognizable from their usual selves.

Alec tore his gaze away. “I didn’t mean for it to sound like that.”

Magnus huffed, crossing his arms. Something inside him felt deflated. “Well, it did.”

Alec heaved a deep breath, the careful collection fading marginally alongside the rage. “I’m sorry. You’re not a burden, and I do want to build a life with you. Just- I need you to not get upset every time you realize I have a life of my own, too.”

“I-” Magnus cut himself off, rethinking the knee-jerk reaction he was about to have at the accusation. It wasn’t actually an accusation. It was a compromise, an olive-branch, and Magnus didn’t want to burn the whole tree down just because he couldn’t douse his pride. “Okay, fine. I love you.”

Alec’s mouth twisted, and this time it stayed that way. “I love you too.”


End file.
